When most people think of a legacy, such negative connotations as pain and fear might not be the first thoughts that come to mind. But psychotherapist and author Joan Rubin-Deutsch will explain how such emotions and feelings are passed down through generations when that legacy is domestic violence.

Rubin-Deutsch, a licensed independent clinical social worker (LICSW) with a private practice in Acton, will present "Lost Childhoods and Broken Dreams" at the Trinitarian Congregational Church in Concord on Monday, Nov. 19. The presentation, which will be held in recognition of World Day for the Prevention of Child Abuse, is sponsored by the Network for Women's Lives, a local nonprofit organization that raises awareness of domestic violence and other correlating issues.

"Who we are as adults is a direct result of what we learned in our families," said Rubin-Deutsch, who will highlight the long-term impact on children who experience or witness domestic violence. "I'm going to look at the childhood experience," she added. "What it was like for these children who were subjected to violence and abused themselves."

Without visual aides, as Rubin-Deutsch believes the impact of her words and stories are more than sufficient, she will explain how the trauma of domestic violence affects the psyche. She will also provide examples of how people view themselves after these experiences, especially, how people deal with fear, loss and trust will be stressed in the presentation. "I don't want to lecture," she clarified. "I just want to talk."

Rubin-Deutsch said the legacy of domestic violence is represented in the emotional wounds that children carry when they are the victim or observe their parents or siblings as victims. Painful lives as children, she explained, can be carried over into adulthood, as can depression from a parent to a child and other similar problems. The presentation will also share that this does not have to be the case and the legacy can be broken. "I'm also going to do a piece on the healing process," she said. "How do you have a life that's not all about being a victim and living in fear? I just want to acknowledge that people can heal and live a purposeful life -that they can feel good, that there's something beyond that they can get to."

Rubin-Deutsch's book, "Why Can't I Ever Be Good Enough?" deals with the negative legacies and the messages children receive through being exposed to domestic violence. "It affects our minds, bodies and spirits," she said.

Rubin-Deutsch said she has been connected with her presentations facilitator, The Network For Women's Lives, for three years and served on the organization's board for a year. The Network distributed a handbook for teens called "Love isn't Supposed to Hurt," for which Rubin-Deutsch was the author, that has been distributed to the Concord and Acton schools. "The Network does amazing things and I'm really proud to be a part of the organization and to be doing this presentation feels wonderful to me," said Rubin-Deutsch.

Rubin-Deutsch's presentation is free and open to all. For more information about the Network for Women's Lives, visit networkforwomenslives.org or call 978-287-4089.

—Thursday, November 15, 2007